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September 2013

Fall Is...

Non existent in Hawaii.

  Photo 2-1

You'd think I would realize this since I was born on the islands. But being away for the past 17 years living in states where Fall existed. (Ugh, MD was beautiful in the fall and AK had a brief Fall too). I have really grown to LOVE fall. By far, it is my favorite season. The cooling temperatures, the golden-light, the earlier sunsets, the turning of leaves, wearing Ugg Boots, comfy sweaters.. I could go on and on.

But here I am, in flip flops, hair tied in a ponytail, no comfy sweaters, or having a cup of coffee on my brisk morning walk. In fact, we just went to the pool today (cloudy and all) just for kicks and to practice my strokes. Meanwhile, my IG feed are filled with beautiful turned leaves, people in comfy sweaters, and proof of cooler temps to come.

So let's face it, there is NO Fall weather here in Hawaii.

Back to Fall is...
Return of TV Shows

Yup, you know me and my TV shows.
Although one show that doesn't follow the line up of the regular schedule, Breaking Bad is one we have been watching since Season 1, and it's coming to an end, and we couldn't be more sad. Not only has this show won awards like there's no tomorrow, but we have fallen in love with these outrageous characters. I mean, when I watched my first episode, I was like "What the heck? A former Chemistry teacher making meth in an RV?" But the growing plot has been phenomenal. Brilliant writing and an overall great cast! So sad to see that one end. Although I'd like for all of them to live happily ever after. What kind of message does that send people? Selling meth has to have an abrupt end, I guess.

How I Met Your Mother. We've officially met the "Mother!"
Modern Family. This one we just got into and I'm glad we did, we didn't start from the first season, and this show you really don't have to. But we are hooked, hilarious show!
Greys Anatomy. I spent a lot of time catching up on this show from season 2 or 3, and they are now on season 10. I have to say, it's... ehh. The minute I heard Sandra Oh was leaving the show, I think a part of me left too. She is my favorite one! The chemistry between her and Meredith Grey is irreplaceable. I don't think I can go on...
Scandal. Another show we caught up during the summer when we were looking for shows on Hulu and Netflix to help the time pass. But I must say, Keri Washington (bow down) you are amazing!!!
The Walking Dead. Of course we are all anxious for this show to come back. We are all Zombie fans in this house and quite prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse btw.

I'm sure I'm missing more, but I tell you what, between Hulu, Netflix, and the ability to record shows, we never watch them live anymore. Oh technology, Thank You.


Well that's sad, that my "Fall Is..." list is compiled from the weather to my favorite TV shows. But I'm sure in the months to come, I'll have more to say about my favorite time of year. Or maybe not, because we live in the land of Endless Summers.

Last week, I've been "On-The-Go" and working out like a Mad-Woman, or what I like to call "dedicated". I have put in 3 workouts a day! Yup I said 3!  I start off my mornings with Insanity (about 45 minutes). It's enough to make me walk with a limp when I start my day. Then when hubby gets home from work, we hit the gym for some Strength Training, which I've been LOVING because I'm starting to see "real" results. A few months ago, you'd have to look hard to see my bicep or tricep muscles.. but now I don't have to flex "so hard".
(below, Before & After about a month apart)
Photo 1-2

Photo 2-2


So we'd do a quick session and head to our Swimming Lessons. (Yup hubby decided to join me even though he's a pretty good swimmer.) Now.. Swimming.. Let's talk about this for a second. It is a WORKOUT! Okay not wading in the water and floating on your back. I'm talking about LAP SWIMMING. Holy, Moly. Even though we swim the width of the pool which is 25 meters one way. Our instructor has us doing 6x25 for the warm up! And we'd swim at night, when it's a bit chilly but we are sweating like crazy! Lap swimming is the most extensive workout I have ever done. Hands Down! (Oh yeah, more extensive than running 13 miles any day!)  It's the only workout where you are using your entire body! You are reaching for your strokes, kicking with your feet, and most importantly you need to control your breathing. All of which are HARD if you are not like the fittest person in the world! So I'm sure at the end of the night we are burning a "ka-jillion" calories!

So these triple workouts aren't gonna last long. It takes a lot of time and swimming classes ended on Thursday. But I'm loving that I'm constantly "craving" a good workout. I'm feeling great, seeing results, loving my Vegan Shakeolgy (been on it for several months now) and the thing that keeps me going is inspiring people that "follow" me via FB or IG. We connect, share, and continue to inspire and push one another. I am surrounded by such a great network of people that even if I think of taking a break, I'll get a message or nudge, saying "Did you workout today?" Being surrounded by positive people who continue to lift me up helps me through the slump I feel when I don't want to do anything.

Back to my first ever swim lessons.. Well, let's just say, there were tears involved when asked to jump into 10 feet of water to practice "Survival Swimming!". But minutes later, I went off the diving board and water slide into that same 10 feet of water. I'll have to recollect my thoughts and share them in another entry, I'm sure you will get a kick out of it. 

Till then.. enjoy your weekend!



crisis |ˈkrīsis|
noun ( pl. crises |-ˌsēz| ) a time when a difficult or important decision must be made: [as modifier]


"The unexamined life is not worth living." -Socrates


I have been blessed with some dear friends that live near and far, who live different lives, but somehow our paths crossed and we've become intertwined in this journey called life. I share something in common with everyone of them to which I hold dear to my heart.

During my time of "crisis" these ladies never hesitated to lend a listening ear. Even though they think they didn't do much, just texting, talking, emailing, or Instagramming them meant the world to me. 

My "crisis" this time came in the form of "What do I want to do now, with my life" LOL, you ever get that way? Where things are going fairly great and you are thinking, you could do "more" but you are just not sure what.  As a stay at home mom for 17 years, this feeling has consumed me every now and then, more like once a year or so. Aside from being a mother, there's something that has seemed to define me for a major part of my life, something that I know I'm good at. And that was being a photographer, it has for the most part, been a passion of mine for many years. And when I moved here, I knew that diving into photography would be a struggle. I am surrounded by so many talented people that I'm just a little fish in a giant ocean of... sharks!  Although the company I'm affiliated with is amazing the "style" of work they expect from me is very different from what I'm used to. And for that reason, my creativity came to a screeching halt and I found myself doing things "just because." As any artist would agree, we work from the "heart", I know it sounds cliche, but we do. We gotta "love" it or we will not grow. With a business like this, where everyone and their grandmother is a photographer, it's all about "connections." So far, I've made some amazing connections. I love second shooting for Ashley cause our style is similar and she's loads of fun. Shooting with her reminds me of all the reasons why I love photography.



She's been in this business for awhile and she has the "connections" but her current job now is working closely with TV/Movie crews as a Scout Director so she's had to push her "photography" to the side, but she still gets the "gigs" and I'm ecstatic that she calls on me to help her out. Then I met another guy, from another close friend, who does mostly video. He hooked me up with several other jobs, most recently shooting these guys:


Uhm, yeah.. I know! 

Granted the first time I worked for them, I was a bit "distracted". But I took this "gig" as I would any other "fashion/model" type gig and I stuck to my motto "Fake it till you make it".  And it's proven to work, cause from then I got a few more gigs with them, since their manager liked my work. Although I'd feel a bit more comfortable working with women, once I got to talking to these "bad boys" they were not quite different from me. (Most of them are married with kids and just "ordinary").


But during my time of "crisis" I texted a good photographer friend, I began to express how I was "quitting" photography and couldn't quite understand why that saddened me so much. She clearly put it out there in "text" form for me to read.



And I was so greatful for her input, cause for a moment I felt like a quitter...But she "got" me. And I love that about her. So I took her advice to heart.


I also love getting emails from another gal up in MD cause she and I have been through "quite a bit" to say the least but our lives are so much alike and almost seem "parallel".  We are both military wives who has had the photography business and had to move as well. Confiding in her about these silly moments of "crisis" she never seem to bat an eye, she understands, and most of all makes me feel human to know she has them too. I am grateful for that.

Screen Shot 2013-09-20 at 8.49.48 PM


I decided to take this life on a new (but familiar) adventure.
I'm heading back to school in the Communication Arts Program and getting that degree in Graphic Arts Design/Marketing. Something that I've always had a "feel" for. It's a career in which I can incorporate my love for photography for sure. But this knowledge would just pave the way to new opportunities, some of which I'm ready for. I want to expand my horizons, learn more, cultivate this life.

I have to admit, my college kid has a lot to do with my decision to go back to school. I remember when he texted me a pic of him in class, where he was using Adobe Photoshop to clone an image and place it over another one. I thought, "I can do that! I wanna learn more too!"

I love that I'm always "hungry" to learn more and I'm "fueled" by my desires. Staying "static" has never been my thing. For a while, I dedicated my 24/7 to my husband and children, and they are still number one, but this time, it's about me as well.

Speaking of cultivating my life..
I'm also currently in Swimming Classes and they are at night so it's a bit "cold". But once your in there doing your laps, you actually work up a good sweat!

Photo 1

Photo 2

“There are no such things as limits to growth, because there are no limits to the human capacity for intelligence, imagination, and wonder” - Ronald Regan



Thirty Six.


While my 34th year was a roller coaster of emotions, my 35th year was a time of healing, renewal, and self discovery. Most of my days as a 35 year old was spent making the most of each day. My word for the new year was "renew" with this quote in mind:

“Renew, release, let go. Yesterday’s gone. There’s nothing you can do to bring it back. You can’t “should’ve” done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!”

By God, if you told me a year ago, I would be doing half the things I've done that made my stomach tremble with fear and ending with a smile so big, my heart could feel it. I would call you "crazy". But that's exactly how I spent most of my days as a Thirty-Five year old woman. I took chances, took that leap of faith, looked fear in it's eyes, and literally smashed it to the ground. I took pride in myself, I took time to "fall in love" with myself, to educate myself, to train myself, to strengthen myself. All of which, healed my soul, one moment at a time.


Most importantly, I allowed myself to "feel" to get in touch with what hurt the most to what brought me sheer joy. I refused to shield my heart from people or moments simply because I was afraid. I learn to trust, and with, that I was able to peel off layers so I could be transparent to the one person that I kept hiding from.


On my actual birthday, our family along with the Sheehans did the Run or Dye. It was the perfect kind of birthday, doing what I love, running my family, AND in color!IMG_2838





And lately, the beach has been my refuge. My place to just "relax" and take a breather. I'm finding comfort in the sound of the waves crashing, salt water in my hair, and being in the water. Which is all new to me, as I have been afraid of this vast ocean most of my childhood/teenage/and adult years.. But once I got over that, I find the beach somewhat of a retreat for me. (Still odd to hear me say).




Year 35, you were good to me. I learned a lot about myself, one of which is that I tend to be my biggest obstacle. I doubt myself to much, I don't give myself enough credit, I sulk in my mistakes, I let negativity in more than I should. But I also grew stronger, I believed I could and I did. I don't give up. When fear settles in, it's a good sign, that I press on and just do it.


So this is for you, Year 36.. Bring it on!