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April 2014

Exhausted, Exasperated, and Engulfed.



I guess it's a expressive night with a lot of "e's".
It's 11:03 pm, Pandora is blaring through my MacBook, with Mariah Carey Station. (Don't ask.. I have my MC moments).

Today I kissed my Math Exam #3 good-bye and I could not be more relieved. Although I did NOT (repeat NOT) get the grade I was hoping for (Is 90% to much to ask for?) I walked away with a 78%. I cannot even begin to tell you how badly I want to "get" this math thing. It's driving me, next to insane that I cannot grasp this whole math thing. My relationship with numbers along with that critical kind of thinking, a person needs to comprehend all of this has never been my greatest attribute. I am so envious of those people who smile at the challenge of a problem that would take an entire sheet of paper to solve. However, the "obsessive" side of me won't give up, I continue to push through and try my damnest to stay above a "D". (I totally failed my first exam and was averaging a "high F" for a while). So staying afloat on a life raft of a mediocre "C" is quite an accomplishment, but I cannot help to beat myself up. If you know me, you know that I'm a fighter and I don't like to settle for mediocrity. However, I may have to let math get the best of me, I can't win it all, and accept mediocrity.


In other news... I am feeling inspired, wondrous, and all around remarkable. (I could probably hit up the gym a little more and throw in some cardio...) but other than that, I've just been enjoying... this thing called life. Not only am I enjoying school and my CA classes, I've made some new friends in the program who make me feel young and old at the same time. I can't seem to leave that "motherly" stance at home. I find myself asking these kids I sit next to if they did their homework and if I see that they did not, I ask why (as if I was scolding them) then offer my help. It's amazing at the excuses all these young kids come up with these days. I wouldn't know anything about that, I was never their age... (insert winky emoticon don't have). But with all these new people I've introduced in my life, I'm learning to open myself up more to the idea of new friendships and relationships. I realize that each person in my life brings their own array of colors to my world and I appreciate the spectrum that illuminates from these various souls. (That was poetic, insert clapping hands emoticon). Life has a way of blessing me with amazing people who enrich my soul and make this life on earth, more meaningful.  I am absolutely smitten by my new neighbor who is the sweetest Southern gal I've ever met. Her spirit is always so inviting and lively, it just makes me want to stop what I'm doing to just "hang" and enjoy the day.

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.--Anaïs Nin


I'm looking forward to a "math-free" weekend. (Although I need to start on my research paper about GMO's!)  I'm quite excited about that one, along with researching, I am "feeding" (GMO free that is --insert a laughing emoticon) my mind with some wealth of knowledge. It's amazing how much the US population) are not aware of what they are putting into their bodies, nor do they care. This is definitely an eye opener, I know we've all heard the term "GMO-free",  "Whole Foods", "Processed" vs "Natural".. but how much do we really know about it? We, all have the right to know exactly what we are consuming and become more informed about how it affects us. I admit, I am alongside the majority of Americans who have never gone further than scanning the price label on a food product. I never thought to do my own research on what's really inside some of the basic foods that we place on our dining tables. But as I continue to research, I am appalled at the research and most importantly how most of us turn a blind eye. For those that turn the other cheek, when the topic of GMO arises, I ask you, "With this one precious life we've got, why not make it the best of it? Why not give your body what it needs?" We all have that power and the option to do so. I'm not sure about you, but I plan to live a life of vitality by enriching my mind, body, & soul. Food for thought, GMO free that is.. (Insert last emoticon, smiley face, winky face, and tongue out)